Mood swing days

I've lately been feeling super low and irritated. Like my battery has run out.

I am happy at times and almost at the peak of how happy can you be and then the slightest or smallest setback happens and I can't take it.

Just the other day first my phone broke and later that evening I couldn't work a video editor the way I wanted or felt most logical.

I almost threw my Mac and camera to the wall and felt like I just want to quit.

Started thinking that am I bipolar or something. What is wrong with me.

Then I spoke to my sister, both of my sisters are younger and smarter than me (seriously!), and she asked me a very very good question:

Why did I feel like I needed to take time off to myself?

I answered that because I was burned out and needed to downshift.

Well, have you been doing that? When have you had a day without your todo- list and just enjoyed your time?

Sheesh, I thought.

I seriously have been the most unemployed unemployed person. I started to post on Instagram on my new handle, then I started this blog, then I started to vlog.

I've also been trying to get companies to collaborate with me, and that means scouting, sending email, calls, meetings...

I've also been cast to do few commercials, voice-overs, still photo- shoots. I apply, almost every day there are gigs that I think would fit me, then I got to auditions...

And then back to the blog and vlog. I think about new ideas all the time. Sometimes I get super overwhelmed by the number of ideas and end up either starting many sketches or not writing or filming.

The list of undone tasks haunts me.

But back to why do, I think I've been feeling such low energy.

I think that I was so burned out, maxed out of all my energies that I have been doing too much in sense of recovery. Seen as I'm do not want to slow down I just need to accept that in order to keep up with all that I want to do the basics must be in order.

I must sleep better, I must keep focusing on my eating and do things that make me happy. Remember to have days of not doing anything.